Best of spam for November 2006

"Sometimes Spam is artistic." At least that's what Adam Oconnell told me in a spam titled "regards strenuously".

A light month for good subjects but to make up for it some very odd sender "names". Meds are now "ed-s".

Earthlink is very good about filtering out the, um, male en,hance.ment spam before it gets to me, but a bunch slipped through this month. There was an interesting collection of euphemisms used to get past the filters: super size, big lift, super duper, improve your package, pencil dickitis, bendy boner blues, mammoth proportions (Yowch!!!), shortdick syndrome, large and in charge, thicker, fuller and longer (works for shampoo ads), "Gain the length and width you've always wished you had". Though a spam with the subject "Hang fat" was blunt enough that filters should have thrown red flags all over the place. Do keep in mind as you're browsing your own "How is your johnson" spam: "When choosing a peniz en1argement method, there are many MANY options these days. But very few are worth the money. In fact, most are full blown scams!"

Names

• Willis Gay
  
• Micah Fish
  
• Francisco Chan
  
• Rose Reyna (though Reyna Rose has a nicer ring to it.)
  
• Dick Nixon (dead presidents become spammers)
  
• Shukla Rishi

Odd senders

• Major Pain
  
• Cyber Molly
  
• Roxanne Turnaboutz
  
• Celina Slept
  
• Hurtle Genaro
  
• Dalton Liquidity
  
• Archaism Carlton
  
• Beelzibus
  
• What Says
  
• Handsome Ballet
  
• Fatten Howard (which could be suggestive but the spam was for watches)
  
• Dejesus Alphabetical
  
• Simultaneously Animals
  
• Susceptible Volstead
  
• November Winnie
  
• Poison Revelry

Sounds like names

• outhouse cahill
  
• merlin dwarf carl
  
• carl bloodhound

All in the same spam, selling ... watches. They must be some very special watches.

• Flagging Morero
  
• Interrupt Katy
  
• Daley Bliss

Subjects all next to each other sending some kind of meta-message

• We can help every man
  
• when Morphophonemic Bestow
  
• or asheville Gena
  
• time to check it

Subjects

• retailer secret agent
  
• electroencephalogram Dog sports
  
• Scorpio curler
  
• regards strenuously
  
• oclock emerald
  
• Or in revertive
  
• whipped lockup
  
• answer a hi
  
• It determining well off
  
• About on your letter
  
• Put croud slipped
  
• ink sentences paragraphs

At least they're honest award

• "In an unnecessary delivery, even here is" which, less interestingly, might just mean "To unsubscribe" since it came with a little picture of a stop sign. Also included was a tiny picture of Japanese money.

Phrases

• porridge happened
  
• volcanic slanderous solitude
  
• huckleberry above my persimmon
  
• litmus kitten

Poetical nonsense

• may ponies huntley
  may frankel united


• what efforts bloodvessel and amuse lonely
  what trust regarded it tenure lobster
  it's morning undergrowth in encountered bauhaus


• that wicked bluebell
  may acquaint valuable
  the ovate honour
  or toyota pressed


• some flatus fibers
  it's opened traditions
  as invasive entry
  it playing fictional
  as decorative tamale
  a unfortunate toroid
  as rider insects
  it's considerable seesaw
  may laos bloodbath


• the saucer flesh it demands declarative not joined judges
  
• but excited christs when undervalued sunken some extensor survival
  
• in undersigned polaron a obituary declared when excitement lively
  
• but goodnight warned that liking alabama was formal affects the action noted
  
• it's beings preclude it's angle pin or medieval rd in oldest darkness
  
• what tales reform that swallow grounds

Sentences

• To the beloved Use password 02700 to open archive.
  
• If I am asked to link to a Kangaroo farm in Canberra, New South Wales, Australia, I sure will do it.
  
• Across the shoulders came the featherd wound.
  
• Cattle is all I know.

Almost makes sense

• The bagel then descended into the canoe.
  
• Robots of new Best Friend Page.
  
• Hearts involved Splat.
  
• Not mention excellent fish chips glorious sunshine in filmed opening.
  
• Managers supporters out or not mention excellent fish chips glorious.
  
• It's a albrecht sparkle minaret.
  
• Probably maybe Yesit!
  
• Urie come up air often.
  
• Guys had soul become some of kind weird iconic symbol.
  
• He shakes the pointed spear and longs to try poultice paperweight soft.

Real but funny nonetheless

• Instead of smelling like dirty socks, try smelling good and attracting women at the same time

Headlines

• Starbucks Loses Laptops
  
• Harvey is Badly Drawn
  
• national needs may meow depletion
  
• Exciting Ashes newsalex!

Spam wisdom

• You can't get there from here.
  
• Alternative: Who guards the guardians?
  
• A creaking door hangs longest. and A creaking gate hangs long

Words

• Tourwomens
  
• neosoul
  
• marquess
  
• chuff
  
• muezzin
  
• peacock
  
• braggart
  
• shitepoke - From shite + poke, with reference to the birds' habit of defecating when disturbed.
  
• chamomile
  
• bedazzle
  
• rollick

Best of spam for October 2006, Part 2

"List all the SPORTS you remember loving or hating in your lifetime. Choose several from your completed list and write about HOW SPORTS CAN TELL YOU A LOT ABOUT A PERSON." -- Spam quote

Spam sports month!

Spam delivered some uncommon sports this month like Camogie, Carambole billiard, Pington, Wok Racing, Sambo and my favorite: Kabaddi. If you don't know what those are there are links to Wikipedia articles below.

After an offer for all the popular/Top/safe "med_s-" or "med+s^" or "med}s*" or Rolex the sports spam had 3 -- and only 3 -- lines of spam random poetry like:

blot be pram it's histogram see quadrupole try beck
it's desideratum but dribble but contrite ! mutant a
cowgirl may theism a homunculus or vertebral not basidiomycetes

A spam story

Some precise warranty
An elusive submarine ever

Slight tremor there. - Which it safe? - Something pretty lousy. even tells you the moment the Wort Dressed Sentinent Being as old man with speed and rust, or so, and play a body which the Galaxy where inexplicable arrival we picked up this afternoon? Ford theory I dont know, - I get a corner with a state of able to do you know if he could grasp in stunned silence again now? - we were directly linked through he had announced itself hence the Galaxy

Subjects

• threatening
  
• hey as Hi
  
• INFO or hi!
  
• hey, long time
  
• mitten or sans not cold
  
• toot premenstrual syndrome
  
• inexpressible changing
  
• electra, wolfgang not buick
  
• amplify on chevy a domesday
  
• wingspan radiation
  
• the somebody
  
• Just like [sent by "haven't"]
  
• Saga score Yoshis crate [sent by remarkably influences]
  
• Someone Else Vent [sent by "not as"]
  
• amateurish couldn't
  
• Experience useful jobs
  
• for several months at a time), your doctor should check your northeast
  
• and properly addictive.
  
• smoke riding [sounds like a sport but it's not. It should be though! Maybe with dragons ... ]
  
• one-to-one curl [another one that sounds like it should be a sport, maybe related to curling]
  
• landhold try debauch may croquet
  
• maxima be soda! vehicular
  
• ugh in shylock may milky
  
• Revolutionary War hothead
  
• plumage but browne, serf
  
• nicotine some synchronism , anna [Related to the Annie's of a few months ago?]
  
• glans it's inhumane on bolshoi
  
• confound it diatomaceous it's ed
  
• charybdis ! amanuensis ! fenton [I don't know what that means! But it must be important!]
  
• workday or bumblebee , godlike
  
• accompaniment on wallace but coloratura
  
• broadloom on assemblage on deoxyribose
  
• bach try conclude vying
  
• expelled in epiphysis ryder
  
• stack be miser try fain
  
• regiment in emeriti brothel limp administrable
  
• buzzword some bye try raindrop
  
• holiday on able the halcyon
  
• collectible it digging it ainu
  
• brash see carryover some joe
  
• self-consciously effectively
  
• pointwise try procedure see jitterbugger
  
• pile it grandparent may egotism

Sports subjects

There was also a sports "name", Exercise Mats, but he wrote about "test. thx hfools"

• Polo Petanque Roller hockey
  
• Speedway Racing Combat robot
  
• Speed skating Underwater hockey
  
• Netball Rhythmic gymnastics
  
• Footvolley
  
• Baguazhang
  
• Pencak Silat
  
• Camogie
  
• Land luge (or street luge)
  
• Aggressive skating
  
• Carambole billiard
  
• Airsoft
  
• Mountain unicycling
  
• Mesoamerican ballgame
  
• Wing Chun
  
• Pington
  
• Wok Racing
  
• Sambo
  
• Speed-o-Ball (Speedball)
  
• ITHF table hockey
  
• Kabaddi Throwing
  
• Kickboxing Throwball
  
• Bocce Bandy
  
• Track cycling Matball
  
• Rinkball Motorboat racing
  
• Aerobatics Athletics
  
• Air racing
  
• Grass skiing
  
• Jumping
  
• Combat sports
  
• Beach rugby
  
• Long distance
  
• Ski touring
  
• Inline speed skating Skater hockey
  
• Rink hockey Unicycle trials
  
• Auto racing
  
• Dodgeball
  
• Equestrianism Hurdling
  
• BMX racing Speed skating
  
• Ballooning
  
• Darts
  
• Dance
  
• Judo
  
• Tug of war
  
• Football (soccer)
  
• Squash
  
• Weelchair basketball
  
• Field Hockey
  
• Mixed martial arts
  
• Kungfu
  
• Cycling
  
• Hip hop dance
  
• Steeplechase
  
• Curling
  
• Luge
  
• Paragliding
  
• Speed skiing
  
• Sports mainly based on sheer power
  
• Sports where the main objective is to hit a certain target.

Names

• Snow Sorenson
  
• Bunks Wolff
  
• Brain Leblanc
  
• Effie Triplett
  
• Wheeler Bender
  
• Park Crain
  
• Slaughter Mcgrath
  
• Hope Riggs
  
• Mercedes Meeks
  
• Hooker Hooks
  
• Frazier Means
  
• Junior Dill
  
• Joey Dooley
  
• Coon Dooley
  
• Smiley Rocha
  
• Randy Posty (though he was just spamming about mortgages ;-)

Sound like names

• ed the wondering langmuir
  
• maximilian the perfectly secular
  
• duncan the mckenzie the injure
  
• dora the buttonhole
  
• barrett the betel
  
• pomona the spade
  
• alex spinnaker the colombo
  
• gummy the corporeal
  
• ernest the micronesia
  
• hedgehog the mobster
  
• arpa the hove
  
• mit the sauerkraut
  
• flutter the deliquescent
  
• beguerdon the sixgun
  
• beef the Neanderthal

Phrases

• coliform the derriere
  
• viking may prospect the cahoot
  
• the wolf be cologne in bathtub
  
• ecumenist try matchbook some team!
  
• treetop and coworker may tearful and convention, licentious!
  
• elegant in mantis
  
• flam it next!
  
• Tricks part is Deceptive
  
• some bizarre may bellflower a bishop
  
• interpolate some merrymake but telescope see frailty and badminton
  
• sax a dandelion
  
• pollux some schloss
  
• surmise the crust
  
• dancer chemise
  
• innocent nuts
  
• may shears dingdong the balustrade directors
  
• the seldom precise fighter pilot

"Advertisements"

• germicidal? try octoroon on breath
• Exploiting fragile coral in reef ecosystem a fun and in profit.
  
• It's the best thing I've ever seen for getting residue of all kinds.
  
• The consultants recommend homogenised transitional flexibility.

"Poetry"

purgation try lodestone try devilish ! sympathy but asexual dichotomous but margery be magic in craze a gemlike!

cite not there it draftsmen the admix the silo it bistable in dabble the canton, trade or continued a sloth try southey in kline the phd

parley some lip be tragicomic but sycophantic a rupee birdseed be airlock see thence see bestial but bogging  trycavil it's yeshiva try differ may caw and horseshoe the magna it's ease not finland may denotative it 

"Headlines"

• Zango stealing affiliate adult webmasters
  
• Extinction is just around the corner

Sentences

• Whatever you're facing here, you can put it aside.
  
• First thing I've noticed this year: they've dropped the french from under the rims.
  
• federal agency that supports fundamental research and education across all have been recommended to improve the quality of lake monitoring in man.
  
• doesn't Google have a problem with impression spam already?
  
• This will enable the Clinton administration to view lighting.
  
• Benny vents his anger on a shop window full of multiple TV elementary schools.
  
• Asked if Musharraf was behaving like an ostrich, Karzai flatly said no and relayed Musharraf's words to him when he was visiting Kabul, "Don't doubt my intentions -- doubt my capabilities."
  
• that called forth the treasured pipe from its casket never to be
  
• It usually comes, drawn by the entrancing odor of hopeful ideas.

Almost sentences

• coven the empire on ganymede
• Where is did? Romance edit is primary links Seduction or with personal hygiene world wide web is full articles stories a on how is.
  
• persecute it hedge and daughter the brazen in downturn
  
• Or beer what they die?
  
• That or will make in crazy about or a vendors who am like am sell their books or repeat same.
  
• Loading a black powder revolver is a. It gorges on a half-cooked stew of suppositions, superstitions and half-finished stories. and finding work for them in Web-based advertising and entertainment, as well as in the older media.
  
• it's broadway makeup when puppy digest but lebensraum knuckleball or paunch intended
  
• cowgirl may theism a homunculus or vertebral not basidiomycetes

Words, words, and almostwords

• acronis
• anotherheavy
  
• asilomar
  
• beeblebrox (from Hitchhiker's Guide)
  
• beguerdon
  
• betony
  
• bloccati
  
• blowsearch
  
• bringsi
  
• brydon
  
• bryozoa
  
• cancellate
  
• cloister
  
• creon
  
• cryssure
  
• cuttlebone
  
• cutworm
  
• distance.cruel
  
• dojealousy
  
• everincreasing
  
• expiresdaylight
  
• fastercures
  
• filamentous
  
• finwhat
  
• flamand
  
• frambesia
  
• frazzle
  
• girlits
  
• gisaxs
  
• governmentwithout
  
• grace.people
  
• heardsay
  
• heremakes
  
• horrorfest
  
• hummingquarters
  
• knocks.near
  
• mastadon
  
• miff
  
• mind.not
  
• mistaken.mrs
  
• mitochondrial
  
• mortician
  
• nirvana
  
• no-daily-shower
  
• nogood
  
• oseeon
  
• ostracod
  
• ouzel
  
• pagemy
  
• pandanus
  
• peculate
  
• polyploidy
  
• promptitude
  
• putter
  
• pyrrhus
  
• quibble
  
• quicktempered
  
• rance
  
• reallife
  
• replyname
  
• replywords
  
• ripresa
  
• romande
  
• sculpin
  
• seraphic
  
• silenceestranged
  
• snikt
  
• songbag
  
• spoor
  
• styrizo
  
• xince